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How to Grieve Your Divorce

How to Grieve Your Divorce

Writer Nora Ephron once said, “marriages come and go, but divorce is forever.” It’s true that, while a marriage might not last, the emotional damage resulting from a divorce can feel endless. This is a reality that’s become increasingly prevalent for Americans; just about 50% of all marriages end in divorce, and in California it’s a staggering 75%. That means that three out of four marriages in California end in divorce. If you are part of this majority, it is absolutely necessary for your well-being that you learn how to cope with a divorce. It can be especially hard when your ex continues to be a figure in your life after the divorce, socially or as a co-parent. Though everyone experiences grief in different ways, there are a few stages of grief that are widely accepted as universal. Recognizing and processing these stages is essential to your mental and emotional healing post-divorce. One of the first stages of grief is mourning. Mourning can manifest itself in many ways, like anger, sadness, or bitterness. It’s important to allow yourself to process these feelings. A divorce marks a huge change in one of the biggest elements in your life, and mourning that change is an integral part of coping. While mourning, be sure to confide in friends, family, or a counselor about your feelings. You may find yourself feeling angry or vengeful towards your spouse, and that’s normal too. In fact, you may find that your spouse is dealing with these strong emotions too. Try to be sympathetic and receptive. You and your spouse might want to take the time to...